As founder and director of Lolas: a community for women’s empowerment, Alexandra Mar works to understand what women’s needs are; what makes them stagnate or develop like this offer them the tools they need to help them become the best version of themselves. The community creates a space where all women can share their voices and realize that they are not here to compete or envy each other, but rather to improve their abilities.
Alexandragave life to lolas several years ago with the mission of giving back to the female figure the learning that allowed her to build the life she has now. The matriarchal environment in her home taught her that there women were inspiration, strength and power the women of her family taught her with love and companionship the value of sisterhood. Talent and background: Paola Jaramillo stands out with her swimwear brand
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During her time at school and university, she was able to reflect on the envious, rivalrous and competitive behavior of some women when it comes to relationships. A) Yes, Lolas became his biggest projecta place where many can share their stories, but also where Alejandra shows them that they have strength, ability and where they can be themselves to build a life that makes them feel proud and at peace.
It is important for Mar that in lolas talk about self-love, mental health, the body, sexuality, loneliness, tussle, among other issues that have arisen according to their experiences, as well as those shared by many women in the community. To respond to this content, he commented:
It is important to re-educate yourself so that you do not focus on the outside and do not fall into comparison, reproducing everything that is abroad. Look within and refocus to see the authenticity that is within our being, understand for example how we define happiness, how we define having the perfect partner or what it would be like for us to have the perfect friendship, because when we take the time to rethink what we want for ourselves, we realize that it is even very different from what we see outside and what we have been taught is supposed to be the best or what is comfortable.
A community to be and be inspired by
Alejandra highlighted this as they share content and interaction dynamics with their followers values are exchangedwhich are established naturally, in this interview he mentioned some:
The beginning: Lolas’s interest is not in being right about the content or that a particular woman is right, the most important thing is the desire to see the world with all its contrasts. That women are open to multiple truthsbecause depending on life experience, some truths are generated that are very different from others, and this is completely valid.
This openness and curiosity to understand the other is important so that it is truly understood that as a multiplicity there are different visions and through these visions the vision of collective life is built.
Empathy: understand the other and relate to others; leading to values such as openness and humanity. She pointed out that apart from being a woman, it’s a matter of being completely vulnerable people who have lives with specific problems and deep needs that affect them. He explained that human beings have ways of connecting, feeling identified and being accompanied, which is why he emphasized the importance of suggested the human theme in Lolas and thus sows the seed that there really isn’t much difference in this human experience.
Intuition: trust in one’s own being; in the vision of the world, in what you want for yourself, since most of the time you look for validation and answers from outside, from other people. This happens because there is no connection with one’s own being, but ultimately everything is within. It’s the way they try to instill confidence in the women of the community, in their intuitions, in who they are, because it’s a way to have courage and strength. If you trust them, you feel much more powerful doing what you really feel. ‘I went through denial, anger, sadness and acceptance’: Flavia Dos Santos on her cancer
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Alejandra stressed the importance of asking women often about what they are feeling and she does it through her messages, in this way she tries to make them feel like pain, something that bothers them, it invites them to ask themselves if they are really doing what they want or they do it to meet the standards that society presents as “correct”.
At Lolas, we don’t indoctrinate what is right or wrong, and so you can even find content that focuses on many different visions of life, but somehow they all contribute to the fact that we really are the ones who find what is true to us and the tools that help us grow That is, in Lolas there is no absolute truth and no perfect way to do what we want. We find the answers and build our version of life that we would be truly proud of through the knowledge shared at Lolas.
Let’s build this desired life, he emphasized be aware of your own thoughts and feelings, because the current dynamics of life are immersed in constant desires and pre-established routines; activities that are disconnected from reality, fall short of expectations, and can separate people from their goals.
He went on to explain that everyday worries are about how they perceive situations, such as how they are allowed to affect them because they are unable to say no for an answer or simply set boundaries. How the focus is on meeting the needs of others instead of their own, or how someone doesn’t know what they want for themselves because they haven’t listened to or connected with their gut. One of the most powerful tools you always have is your own connection. Alexandra emphasized that there are many ways to connect with the interior.
If a situation makes a person feel bad, his energy drops, or some thought prevents him from moving forward it is recommended to take a moment, stop whatever is being doneI close my eyes and think to myself, “What is this doing to me?” It’s not about what I’m going to do to change the situation, it’s about, “what am I going to do to change the way this is affecting me?” me? “, “What can I do to make myself feel better?” because there are things that cannot be controlled and they are out there somewhere. The question is how this situation is read and how it is allowed to affect life, sometimes you just have to change the way you see situations.
This digital community has grown not only in numbers, has expanded to different countries such as Argentina, Ecuador, Spain, Peru and of course Colombia. It also did so by creating intimacy with its followers through experiences that stemmed from virtuality, such as the sister account of lolas call travelerswhich offers the experience of going places alone to connect and share with other women.
Through the growth of the Lolas, we also grow, so it’s very beautiful, because the result is mutual, if they grow in the way they see the world and in the way they understand other women, then the space is transformed. We are also what we are now because of the women in the community and their interaction. It’s been a very natural and organic evolution through openness, knowing that it’s not about being one in the world and that’s it, but that there are many women who share very valuable things that add up, so we need to see how others contribute as well about the process and how Lolas contributes to theirs.
The importance of creating spaces such as lolasallows you to display women who are not alone in their life experiences, that they are not crazy to experience moments of great anxiety or sadness, that they are not unusual for having “the hangover” of a relationship that ended months or years ago and have not been able to get over that they are not weak for showing your sensitive or insecure side. It is clear that there are situations where professional help is needed because it goes beyond what is psychologically healthy, but there are many situations that are labeled as “strange” and after all, many women share and experience them in their different ways .
Open your arms to loneliness and love what is inside you
The human experience and this female experience of gender sharing, is a subject that sometimes transcends, hence the importance of focusing on who one is as a human being. The need for approval, connection, empathy and identified feeling is not unknown, feeling is a part of, but not as the main purpose of life, not as a life disappointment, for example: having or not having friends with whom you are deeply connected, or who others people affirm and give a thumbs up for the done, it’s about being so connected to the inside, to your own beingthat the rest is ultimately a complement.
Social interaction is an invariable part of being human, but not as a form of addiction. Recognizing it allows a person to be sure of who they are and what they want, also accepting the lived experiences because they are what build the human being. That’s why, it is very important for Alejandra to recognize and accept loneliness and balance it with social interactions.
I can say that from my experience giving myself time to embrace solitude is one of the most beautiful discoveries and encounters I have had in my life and is the realization that many things will happen around you, but you are the only thing that is fixed in your life, you are your stable and constant company, people, couples, friends will leave, family members will leave, just because that’s the cycle of life, but you always stay, so it’s not like it’s an option, it’s a necessity is to be with us and in solitude.
What did you want to do and didn’t because you didn’t have the perfect company? When women make these spaces available to themselves, they take ownership and feel more secure because they are not waiting for others to do it for them, as a result: self-love and confidence in what one is and little by little it is strengthened. Nia Sierra Sings About Love Fainting On New Single ‘Premonición’
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Spending time alone is necessary and enjoyable, there are many women who do not give themselves a real opportunity for it. By removing these natural times and one definitely discovers an opportunity, an unknown life path, it’s what you can do in the company of yourself and it’s super empowering.
An invitation from Lolas to other Lolas
In a dialogue with caracoltv.com Mar stated this its purpose is to motivate women so that they take the initiative, start in the way they feel good, each with the minimum and little by little add experiences of solitude to understand that this is the most pleasant thing that can be done in life and which offers a sense of immense independence. Loneliness is not an option, it is a human need and it is the most beautiful thing that anyone can find.
Alejandra hopes that many women will join the community to share their voice, stories, opinions and experiences because it democratizes the passing of the microphone, meaning anyone can speak or join if they just want to find content that inspires, motivates, expands and helps them grow.
He concluded by saying: “What’s coming for the community is really a much more tangible and personalized space where we will accompany the Lolas in their processes and that they can really experience 100% support, company, growth and expansion.”