Having a friend only for sex: the personal agreement of some marriages

  • A sex friend is someone with whom you share both friendship and sexual relations without commitment, even within a consolidated couple

  • With sex buddies, no couple or family breaks up because strong emotional bonds are not established

  • Having a “friend with benefits” is now part of the personal agreements of many marriages, which see it as a way to preserve family stability

The classic double life may not work for everyone. Although family harmony reigns, you can fall into boredom, even in something (a priori) a bit boring like sex. Sometimes you lack time, sometimes you win or that drive from the first years. That’s how it comes about sex friendthe sex-only friend, a trend that is beginning to spread widely among men and women.

What sets this trend apart from having a lover for life is this naturally spokenit is taken as part that can contribute to family harmony and you don’t live from victimizing way. Neither the woman nor the man silently tolerates the presence of a third party and must accept it for different reasons.

In this case, the presence of a a sexual friend is accepted without fail for each member of the pair, no disrupt the life together and will not represent no threat family stability.

Another distinctive fact is that it is not something that belongs only to men. The two members of the couple can have sex friends and even those who want to try other sexual possibilities. Y what sets you apart from the open couple? The fact that the friend you share sex with is always the same: someone you have affinity and chemistry obviously, without achieving major commitments.

Nuria Roca and Juan del Val

Why and for whom?

A sex friend is someone you share with both friendships and sexual relationships, no strings attached No sense of belonging. Although it occurs among young people, it is an increasingly common trend among people between the ages of 40 and 60, joined by women and men in recent years. married gays. “These men are looking for a homosexual partner to live out their own story,” explains sexologist Sandra Rogiers.

The main advantage of these relationships lies in the fact that no broken couple or family. And things are clear: if sexual friends or “touchable friends” are not enjoying themselves together, the relationship ends without drama. As for the usual partner, this is proof that in order to achieve happiness, sometimes you have to take different pathseven in something as intimate as sex.

September, the month of divorces

September, the month of divorces

different motivations

But sex buddies aren’t just for escape from boredom. Apart from marriages or consolidated couples, they are also an option for Women single or separated mothers who have to work and raise their children. In this vital program can be building a sentimental connection beyond the meanseither because of the time you have to devote to it or because you don’t feel ready to live as a couple again.

In this context, episodic relationships have advantages: they can be established connections Free of charge, where the difference in years, for example, does not matter. In the male case, they are usually men who they don’t want to commitbut they escape the couple’s routine.

As we said, some couples agree to these getaways on the condition that support and favor flawlessly family life. It may seem like an easy goal when you’ve lived with the same person for many years and think we know each other perfectly, but it’s not without risk.

What should we avoid?

To develop this type two-way connection you need to not have the same expectations as in a classic relationship. We can’t even ask bond or bond of any kind. It is also appropriate to establish a certain emotional distance. “The biggest risk in this type of relationship is are developing consciously or not feelings to the adventurous partner,” explains the sexologist.

Nor should we give way to the feelings that overwhelm us when we have a partner. “With a sex friend you have to avoid jealousy, routine, impositions… You have to set the boundaries very clearly: a perfect balance between two free personalities,” concludes the expert.

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